The N word

Women are not natural naggers but men drive them to it.

It's true.

If you don't believe me ask any women who's moved in with her fella.

Here's the deal. Well my deal anyway.

I ask John to do something - let's say wash the dishes - and he says 'yeah, no problem.'

Off I go to work delighted that we're a new age couple who share the house cleaning burden evenly.

You can only imagine my surprise when I come home later that same night and find the dishes still there - this time with a few extra plates in the pile.

I bite my lip and ignore the teetering pile of china for the night, I will not be tagged a nag.

The next day I'm off to work again and say oh so casually as I leave 'Babe will you sort out the dishes.' 'Sure no problem' comes the reply.

I'll admit to begin just a tad antsy about the issue now but I'm confident my intelligent and thoughtful boyfriend will sort out the kitchen. After all we have a dishwasher.

Home again - no change.

Next day - no change.

It's at this point I lose my temper and complain there isn't so much as a clean mug for us to share. To which comes the oh so predictable and frustrating reply 'Jesus Niamh, you're turning into such a nag.'

No I'm not. But it's so easy for men to feel smug and to silence their women with that one word.

And the ridiculous thing is that most women are so fearful of complaining and being seen as some old biddy nine times out of ten you'll find them picking up the dirty socks that managed to land beside, but not in, the clothes basket, hanging up the towels that would otherwise languish on the bathroom floor, and bringing the recycling downstairs because their home is in danger of becoming a fire hazard.

I know I'm not alone in this.

I genuinely never believed men and women were all that different until I moved in with John.

He doesn't see dirt. I'm not making excuses, the man will sweep a floor and simply not see a mountain of dirt left behind in a corner. He claims to be allergic to dust yet remains unaffected when the apartment is untouched by polish for a fortnight.

Personally I'm not the most houseproud of girls. I'm more an - out of sight - kind of person so I know I'm not being unreasonable in my requests and , hand on heart, I know I'm not a nag.

A nag is someone who's never done complaining. Asking for a bit of help around the house is normal, if the job isn't done or isn't done right and the request is repeated, well that's normal too.

Guys - unless you're living with some virago who berates you on a daily basis and refuses to let you put your feet up with a few cans during the endless football season then you're not living with a nag.

If you don't like helping out - pay for a cleaner - otherwise suck it up and leave off the n word.


teepee said...

here here. i oftened pondered this women are from venus men are from mars thing myself and it must be true. i swept the floor one day and decided as an experiment i would leave the bundle of dust with the sweeping brush next to it and see what would happen. nothing happened. when i gave out himself said i was playing mind games and leaving traps! however after 3 yrs of co-habitating and 2 yrs of marriage its finally getting better and himself now does a bit round the house without even being asked. oh bliss...